Monday, November 28, 2016

Things I do to Feel Better | Design Life


Hello and welcome to the DesignLife blog where we discuss Holistic Beauty, Personal Development and a little bit of Magic!

I'd love to share with you the little games that I play when I don't feel good. When I play them (consciously) they always make me feel better. These are great things to do if you are feeling unhappy or frustrated or even angry at someone (or yourself). I hope that when you read this, you find a few little gems that you can carry in you pocket for days when things aren't (seemingly) going so well and when the time comes you can take them out, roll them over in your hand and choose which one would be the best and most fun to use.

1. The Breathing Game

This one is the simplest and yet the most effective and honestly once I understood this game, I also understood (in part) why smoking relieves stress. Think about it, when people go have a smoke, they focus their attention on the cigarette and their breathing. Deep inhalations and exhalations. However, I don't smoke and you don't need a cigarette to play this game.

How it works: the moment that you realize you are experiencing an emotion that does not feel good to you (like when you feel angry or anxious) you have to intentionally decide to play this game. Once you have decided to play, if possible, close your eyes (you can play with open eyes too though, I mostly do).

 Put the tip of your tongue on your the roof of your mouth (specifically the space right behind your front teeth). Breathe in slowly through your nose and as you do, imagine breathing in 'good feelings' - whatever that might look like to you! Use your imagination. I imagine breathing in sparkling air (if that makes any sense at all!). Try and breathe in really deeply and feel your chest open up. As you breathe out through your mouth, let your tongue relax and pout your mouth a little. Imagine you are blowing out the bad feelings. I imagine breathing out a dark energy 😗 ...  Repeat at least ten times or until you start feeling better!

This works for me because my body 'releases' the bad feelings and then I am able to approach the situation (whatever made me feel bad) with a new perspective.

2. The Goods List

This game does wonders to lift your mood! Even if you start out playing it just to "get it over with" you will eventually feel your mood shift and walk away feeling at least content (if not very happy)! You can play it anywhere and it's easy to do in your head, but it can be even more beneficial if you get out a piece of paper and a pen and write it down.

How it works: the moment that you realize you are experiencing an emotion that does not feel good to you (like when you feel disappointed or worried) you have to intentionally decide to play this game. Either in your head or on a piece of paper, list ten good things in your life (right now or something that has recently happened).

You can list the most simple things, in fact, the 'simpler' the better. For example, I usually list something I recently ate that tasted really good! I list funny moments that made me laugh or compliments that people have recently given me. I list mornings when it felt really good to sleep in or I think about a dog I had just met at a park and had fun playing catch with (it wasn't even my dog!).

 To make the game even more fun you can do two things:


  • When you list a good thing, take a moment to replay a memory thereof in your mind. Think of the expression you had in that moment, how you felt, what about the moment (or thing) made it good. If you have the time, it's good to remember as much detail as you can.
  • Every time you list another good thing and you finish thinking about it and remembering it or describing to yourself what about it makes it good, go back and quickly go through the things you have already listed. Just mentally run through a word that represents each thing you have listed then go on to the next one. 
It doesn't have to be ten things, I used to only do three. You can even do twenty if you want! 

3. Happy Music

 I think it is a pretty well-known thing that music can affect your mood. According to this online text, "Outside of music affecting the brain as an emotional experience, it is also a physical experience. One reason for this is a hormone related to bonding called oxytocin." So of course I use music to feel better, especially if I'm feeling unmotivated or worried. 

How it works: the moment that you realize you are experiencing an emotion that does not feel good to you (like when you feel uninspired or distressed) you have to intentionally decide to play this game. Get out some earphones or just turn the music up a little louder than usual on the TV or radio. The best thing to do, however, is to use your phone or YouTube so that you can choose which songs to listen to. It's important to choose songs that you know you really enjoy listening to and that have a catchy beat! Make a Happy Music playlist on your phone or, hey! Who still makes mixed CDs? 

Take a break from whatever your doing and listen (and maybe sing or dance along!) to a few songs. If it's possible, leave the music on in the background when you continue with whatever you were doing before. But it's important to take a short break and just listen to the music. Here are some of the songs in my Happy Music playlist:

  • "Best Day of My Life," American Authors
  • "Let It Go," Idina Menzel
  • Major Lazer ft. NYLA & Fuse ODG - "Light it Up"
  •  Martin Garrix ft. Usher - "Don't Look Down"
  • Galantis - "Runaway (U&I)" 
  • Daft Punk ft. Pharrell - "Get Lucky"
These are my three favorite games to play when I feel shitty and when I intentionally decide to play one and do it consciously for at least five to ten minutes, I always feel better. Sometimes The Goods List feels like too much effort, so I just play Happy Music. Sometimes my brain is overflowing with negative thoughts and worry so I have to breathe it out before I can even think about listening to music or making feel-good lists and remembering the good things in my life. The Breathing Game is really the easiest and most beneficial game (for me) and when you get really good at it you can play it while you make fun lists and listen to your favorite songs.

Other things I do include yoga and, when it's possible, I literally just get up and leave - usually I end up at my favorite shopping mall, just because it really feels good to walk around and look at all the shops and the people. 

I hope that the next time you aren't feeling too great or maybe even when you're feeling completely horrible that you remember these little gems and that when you take them out, they catch the rays of the sun and gleam in the palm of your hand! Play them, have fun with them, and remember that you are always loved and the power to feel good lies in your hands.

All my love and remember that YOU are The Creator 💜💜

















Friday, November 25, 2016

How to feel Better | Design Life

Hello and welcome to the DesignLife blog where we discuss Holistic Beauty, Personal Development and a little bit of Magic!

If you're anything like me, you'll find that sometimes you feel really good and sometimes you feel really bad (anyone?). I want to share something with you called the 'emotional scale' which has really helped me in the past to stay focused on feeling better and not drown in that pit of self-despair, because let's face it. Once somethign happens in a minute of our day that crushes our mood, we keep milking that minute for the rest of the day and it's as if things just get worse and worse. It doesn't have to be that way though.

Most of us only realize we're not feeling good until we're feeling really bad, but if we checked in on ourselves more frequently to find out exactly what it is that we're feeling, we stand a much better chance of preventing ourselves from getting depressed and feeling very intense bad emotions. It's not like you just wake up one morning, completely depressed and ready to jump off a bridge - it's a gradual process. One that can be stopped and reversed long before we hit rock-bottom.

The emotional scale:


Many people find themselves more or less in the Orange space - they're disappointed, they worry about a lot of stuff, they blame others for the things that go "wrong"... Sometimes they move two spaces up, sometimes they move two spaces down. Others I've seen descend slowly down to the Grey space... Something 'big' happens in their lives and they slowly (or quickly) descend into grief, depression and powerlessness. This can mean one of two things. Either they let the depression consume them, eating away at their lives and eventually they die in their despair, or they live the rest of their lives oscillating between depression and anger. 

Or, as so many have done before, they use their intense grief as a strong reason to move forward and onward and upward. Many of those people who choose to get better, even when met (again) with disappointment or doubt or worry - they have already gone through "the worst" and they use it as fuel to propel them towards everything they want. Because they have met with the epitome of despair, they know that they needn't go back and they move on. You can't see the stars without darkness. 

It's lovely to know about the Emotional Scale of course, the analogy created by Esther and Jerry Hicks, but how can you use it to your advantage? One of the most valuable things that I have learned from reading so many of their books is that I don't have to feel better all at once. It's nearly impossible to jump from anger, rage and revenge to enthusiasm, happiness and positive expectation. If you can catch yourself earlier on, however, during the Orange space, when you start feeling doubt and worry... Instead of letting those feelings drag you down, immediately turn your attention up (we'll talk about how to do that in a minute). It is much quicker to get from discouragement to enthusiasm, than to get from depression to positive expectation. Does that make sense?

How do you move up the emotional scale?

1. Check in with yourself - really ask yourself, as often as possible, how are you feeling right now? 

2. Acknowledge your feelings. You don't really have to worry to much about why you are feeling this, just confirm that you would like to feel better. 

3. Think about what feeling or emotion is 1 level, or maybe even 2 levels up on the emotional scale. 
For example, if you are feeling despair/powerlessness, it would be anger/rage. 

Now many may argue that it's not good to feel anger or hatred and of course it's not if you're planning on staying there forever. But you're not. Don't you agree that anger is a little better-feeling than depression? At least when you're angry, it comes from a place of power, whereas depression comes from a place of powerlessness. 

4. Once you have identified what feeling it is that you want to move towards, direct all of your attention on that. It's easy to do - just think of as many examples as you can where you have felt that way in the past. Imagine scenarios in your mind that would make you feel like that now.

For example, if you're bored and frustrated that things haven't worked out the way you would have liked it to, but you know that you would like to feel happy and eager for the good things to come, then imagine a time in your life where you have felt happy and eager. Remember that time when you were on holiday and you were so excited while packing your bags to go on that week-long beach trip? Or listen to songs that give you that eager and excited feeling. Or imagine things working out the way you would like them to and focus on the feeling of happiness that it would bring. Just keep boosting that feeling.

5. Repeat step 4 until it becomes your dominant feeling.

And that's how you move up the emotional scale. It really is an easy process, but it does require that you consciously make the decision to feel better. It does mean that you have to get off AUTO-PILOT and be aware of your emotions so that they can guide you to living a life of joy. If you missed my post about why you should let your emotions be your guide, read it here.

I hope that this post was helpful to you. In the next post, I would like to share more little "tricks" or activities that I use to feel better and better all the time. Until then, have a beautiful weekend!

All my love! And remember that YOU are The Creator 💜💜

Wednesday, November 23, 2016

Look for a Way to Feel Better | Design Life


Hello and welcome to the DesignLife blog where we discuss Holistic Beauty, Personal Development and a little bit of Magic!

Wherever you are right now, find a way to feel 
relief. You do not need to jump from feeling depressed to feeling passionate and grateful and joyful, but you do need to take the first step. Look at your options and gravitate toward whatever you can do that will give allow you the alleviation of pain, discomfort or distress. Anything that offers even a slight feeling of reassurance and relaxation is ten times better than anything that doesn't feel good at all.

You needn't do anything drastic, like quit your job or divorce your partner - you might think, at first, that doing this will make you feel better, but sometimes taking steps that are too big and that you are not ready for will inevitably causes more harm than good. No need to jump ship, but do find a way, any way, to feel even slightly better. Small actions accumulate into big changes. 

Abraham-Hicks writes about the 'Stream of Life'. This is a stream that constantly flows and the problem is that most people think we need to swim against the current. We are taught that life is difficult and things that are easy are not worth doing. The real heroes are the ones who have suffered and it takes time and hard work and a lot of sacrifice to get to where we want to be. Of course this is true, if you make it to be so. You can swim upstream all you want and through your hard work and determination you will probably get what you set out to achieve, sometimes. However that's going about it the hard way. If only you would let go of preconceptions and expectations and the "have to's" and the "I should's" and you allow yourself to be carried by the flow of the water downstream, you meet with all of the joy and achievement of everything that you have always wanted. 

I understand that you are met with contrast every single day - you certainly know what you don't want. You don't want to be stuck in this dead end job. You don't want to go to bed alone every night. You don't want to weigh a much, or as little, as you currently are. You don't want to live a limited life. But you see, the beauty of contrast is, is that it reveals to you what you do want. If there was no darkness, we would never see the stars.

It is because you have known sadness that you so clearly know that you want joy. It is because you have known defeat that you so clearly know that you want to win. If life has caused you to want something, it is sure to come true, if you allow it. Often, however, we hold on so tightly to what IS that we stunt the natural growth of our experience. You focus so much on what it is you do not want and all it does is strengthen your knowing of what you do want, but you don't take your attention off of what you DON'T want long enough for what you DO want to flow into your experience. 

Stubborn bunch, aren't we? 

Wherever you are right now, find a way to feel relief. You don't decide to go on holiday and then in the blink of an eye you are there and then in the blink of an eye it's done - no. How many times have you read or heard the phrase, life is not about the destination, it's about the journey. Do we really understand the meaning behind it? I don't think so, because if we did, we would have a little more faith and a lot more fun. When you set your GPS to take you to a specific destination, it might take you a few hours or maybe even a day or two to get there. Sometimes you take a wrong turn, but the GPS always redirects you and gets you back on track. Sometimes you stop to have lunch or admire the scenery. That doesn't mean you aren't going to get to your predetermined destination eventually. 

Life is not about the destination, it's about the journey. So why do choose to live the hard way? Why do we swim upstream? You can swim upstream all you want and through your hard work and determination you will probably get what you set out to achieve, sometimes. But it's so much easier and MORE FUN to swim downstream. Swimming downstream doesn't mean giving up or taking the easy way out, stop trying to justify your strenuous means. There is no good reason to do it the hard way. 

I can write metaphorically until my fingers turn blue, but I know what you are thinking - what does this mean? What does it mean to "swim downstream"? It doesn't necessarily mean that you will wake up tomorrow morning next to the love of your life, with millions in the bank and your dream body (although it might happen!). Swimming downstream means that wherever you are right now, you find a way, any way, to feel a little bit better. If that means taking the day off, take the day off. If that means taking a nap, take a nap. If that means visiting someone who makes you smile or watching your favorite comedy, do that. 

In the next post, I will share more about how to feel better. In the mean time, just breathe and find relief. Relax.

All my love! And remember - YOU are The Creator. 



Monday, November 21, 2016

Let Your Emotions be Your Guide | Design Life

Hello and welcome to the DesignLife blog where we discuss Holistic Beauty, Personal Development and a little bit of Magic!

In the last post I gave an overview of my understanding of the Law of Attraction (read it here). Right now I would like to pick up the discussion where I left off, which was about how to use your emotions to attract and lead you towards the life of your dreams.

There are five commonly recognized senses which include sight, hearing, taste, smell and touch. But we also have a sixth sense - emotion. When you were born, your senses developed naturally. Your taste nerve cells are clustered in the taste buds on your tongue and in your throat and they react to food/drinks mixed with saliva. This just happens - nobody taught you how to taste. In the same sense, no one taught you to feel emotions.

Granted, we are taught to feel specific emotions in response to specific external stimuli (for example, we're generally taught to feel disappointment/shame when we fail at something), but the experience of feeling in the first place in natural.

Whenever you want something, like money, a new job or someone to love, it's stimulated by the feeling of 'not having' it. The experience "I don't have enough money" creates the desire "I want more money". As your desire grows more intense, your vibrational self expands to align with your growing desire. If you want to understand what I mean with "vibrational self, then watch this video, because you need to understand who you truly are before you can understand how to use your emotions to guide you to living the life of your dreams.

The emotions you feel in any given moment shows you whether or not you are in vibrational alignment with who you really are. Your Highest Self knows what you really want and that you can have it all right now, but if you are putting out vibrations that do not match that exciting, knowing signal, then you are going to feel 'bad'

  • jealousy 
  • hate
  • doubt
  • overwhelmed
If in the moment you are putting out vibrations that match the vibration of your Highest Self, you are going to feel 'good'

  • contentment 
  • optimism
  • passion
  • joy and appreciation

It's important to be more aware of how you are feeling, because if you are feeling bad, it means you are not in alignment with Source Energy, which means you are currently attracting things into your life which will cause you to feel wore. In the words of Abraham-Hicks:

You must find a way to allow yourself to keep up with what life is causing you to become, if you are to live the joyous life you came here to live. 

When you feel like you don't have something, it intensifies your desire to have it. Most of us believe that if we had what we wanted, we would certainly feel a whole lot better. Even though I don't argue with the fact that it's much easier to come into vibrational alignment when you are surrounded by physical manifestations of your deepest desire, that doesn't mean you can't feel good now even in the physical absence of those desires. 
Feeling good, or feeling anything for that matter, happens in your mind first. It doesn't come from doing anything. Match your thoughts with the vibration of what you want want first, otherwise no amount of action will bring you the results that you desire (well, not without much strain and effort anyway). 

You can't feel POOR and attract PROSPERITY. Likewise, you can't feel RICH and attract poverty into your own life. Your point of attraction is in this moment, evident in what you are feeling right now - that is an indication of the kind of experiences that you're manifesting into your life. 

When you feel happy and loved (or any good-feeling emotion) you are a match with your True Self/Source Energy/God, which is exactly what you intended when you chose to come into this Universe. 
When you feel doubt, worry or hate (or any bad-feeling emotion) you are holding yourself apart from your natural alignment with your True Self/Source Energy/God. Your emotions will always tell you whether you are keeping up with your inner growth and expansion, therefore creating and attracting better feeling thoughts and experiences into your life. The most important thing then in life is to FOLLOW YOUR BLISS. 

Let me know what you all think about this post and whether there is something you would like me to explain more about. I'm already excited for the next one. 

Much love, and remember that You are The Creator. 




Wednesday, November 16, 2016

The Most Powerful Law in the Universe | Design Life


Hello and welcome to the DesignLife blog where we discuss Holistic Beauty, Personal Development and a little bit of Magic!

It feel so good to be back on the blogging scene - I know I have disappeared for a while. I have been so focused on creating video content that my blog has come to a complete stand still. And yet here I am, with something I would love to share, yet no desire to make a video about it (right now). I've decided to share it on my blog and hopefully getting back into posting regularly on Blogger.

 I recently started a new YouTube channel dedicated to aesthetics and spirituality, see it here. At the moment there are only three videos and what I will be writing about today was supposed to be the fourth, but I feel like maybe I'm not completely ready to commit to this channel yet, but I really do want to share this message and I know that it is only a matter of time until I am going to commit to this channel. I believe in only doing things that feel good to you. Before you do something, either find a way to feel good about it or don't do it (yet).

The video I wanted to do was about the most powerful law in the Universe. The Law of Attraction. To be able to fully understand it, you need to understand who you are. If you feel like you don't really know what I mean when I say that you are a vibrational being, please watch this video before you keep reading: Who you really are.

Great! The Law of Attraction simply states 'that which is like unto itself is drawn'. It works like a radio does - a radio is set to a specific frequency and you are then able to tune into a radio station and listen to that specific station's show or music. You can't set the radio to 94.5 and expect to hear what's going on on 105.1
Your vibration works in the same way. You can't feel bad and expect to tune into good vibes. The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne, distorted people's understanding of the LOA (Law of Attraction). But I am not going to focus on the distortion thereof, but rather on my understanding of it and how I've come to truly experience it's power in my own life. Whatever you give your attention to, consciously or unconsciously, causes your body, your atoms, your very energetic being, to emit certain vibrations. The vibrations that you are sending out is your point of attraction.

If you want something, all you have to do is focus on the feeling of having it, and it will be yours. BUT if you want something, yet you are more focused on the feeling of NOT having it, the LOA will match the dominant vibration and you will get more of "I don't have it yet". Nothing changes.

The reason people don't believe in the LOA is because they attempt "using" it once and if it doesn't "work" like they expect it to within a week or a day, they conclude that it's not true. This isn't merely positive thinking that works for some people, but not for others. This is Universal Law and much like gravity, whether you understand it or not, it's always present. You have practised a specific VIBRATION for a very long time  and the LOA responds to it. If you want to change the way it responds to you, you have to change your vibration.
What does that mean?

The best way I know how to explain all of this is by using the example of neural pathways. A neural pathway connects one part of your nervous system with another via a bundle of axons. A neural pathway is like a road that you choose to drive/walk day after day after day, on your way to work/school. Every time you take that specific road, the memory of it becomes more solid in your mind. Basically, it gets stronger and stronger and this is how habits are formed. You can read more about this on TrueVitality.com

When you keep doing something over and over, eventually you don't even have to think about it anymore, it becomes natural (like riding a bike - remember how difficult that used to be?). So let's get back to what I said about your practised vibration. People try thinking positively for a week, things don't go too well and then they come to the conclusion that the LOA doesn't work. But what is a week's worth of changed thinking compared to what you have been thinking for all those years before? You have years and years of conditional thinking engraved into your brain.

Summarily, when you think about a thing that you want, how does it make you FEEL - good or bad? If it makes you feel good, you are 'using' the LOA for yourself, because the LOA will match your good feeling vibration and give you more of that, which will inevitably bring to you that which causes you to feel good. If you think about what you want and it makes you feel bad (discouraged, envious, impatient), then you are 'using' the LOA against yourself, because you are focused on NOT having it and therefore the LOA will match THAT feeling and you get more NOT having it.

That which is like unto itself is drawn. It's not so much about what you're thinking about, it's about what are you feeling about that which you are thinking about. In the words of Abraham-Hicks:

Every thought, every idea, every being, every thing is vibrational, so when you focus your attention on something, your vibration starts to reflect the vibration of that which you are giving your attention to. The more you think about it, the more you vibrate like it. The more you vibrate like it, the more of that which is similar is attracted to you. 

You always get what you think about most - but do you really know what you are thinking?

Thank you so much for reading this post, I hope I will be able to record a video about the LOA soon. There is so much more to this topic. In the next post (or video) I want to focus on how you can use your emotions as a GUIDE to getting everything that you want.

All my love! And remember that YOU are the Creator.